Dear Vanessa,

I was that kid. I knew I had more horsepower upstairs than almost everyone I interacted with in school, including my teachers. And my grades were terrible. I was the first (and maybe only) person to fail the honors English class in my senior year of high school (that would be the same year I wrote a regular column in the school newspaper, performed on stage in two plays, and won a contest to deliver a self-written speech at our commencement). I went to a state school, partied hard, and dropped out after two years of academic incompetance. If you had taken a snapshot of my life on the day I moved back into my parents' house I'm sure that the betting odds favored a tragic outcome.

Today, 30 years later, I'm a successful serial entrepreneur. I rose to the very top of my chosen field. I married a successful attorney and we raised a wonderful daughter who is an ER nurse. We travel the world, have set aside a reasonable amount for retirement, own our own home, and a sailboat, and every day I do work that challenges me that I love with people who are lifelong friends.

The truth is that there are many many paths to success and only a few run through prestige universities and pressure cooker lives. And I know plenty of people who rebooted their lives in their 30s and achieved high academic success. The doors, in truth don't ever really close.

Your daughter has within her the potential to transform herself and the world, but she'll only do it when she finds the path that rewards her and makes her happiest. Until she does, she's going to struggle. My advise to you is to be ready to provide the safety net when she tries and fails or when she just fails. Failure is not the end, in some cases it's a prerequisite.

I wish you and your daughter the best future for both of you and I believe in both of you!

RyanD